That's what my brother said to me.
The only response I could think of was... "I don't know."

Because I honestly don't know why I don't know to smile or laugh anymore. If I'm talking to you over MSN or dA, I may seem happy. I guess I probably am, since I love this site and you guys and the art on here. But in real life, my smile is gone and I don't laugh, I only chuckle (perhaps dishonestly) and I know I should be having fun but half of me doesn't want to have fun, it wants me to sit here and sulk.

I never used to be like this. I used to be happy - nay, I used to FEEL happy.

Is it because my friends are gone? Is it because I've lost one of them? Is it because the symptoms of my glandular fever are still around, or I might still have it after all these months? Is it just because of the stress of schoolwork, or the fact that I can't finish whatever I draw, or being unable to play the piano? What is the matter with me? I hate this... so much.


In other news, I choked (not literally) in my piano performance for Music today and I walked out in the middle of it. I get to try again next term. Yay for me.


</whinge>